What is Personal Presence?
Personal presence used to be called the ‘first impression’ that is made when you meet someone initially.
Now it can be referred to as a ‘vibe’ that you give off. It is quite frankly an energy level that others feel
and is truly present in the moment. As an example, in a social situation, if someone is a guest and
meeting others for the first time, their presence is hampered if they are playing games on their mobile
instead of engaging with others in the room with them. It is not simply about the dress of someone,
although in business that also imparts personal presence, it is also about engagement, awareness, and
involvement in a moment. This can be business or social situations. Although not called the first
impression anymore it is still that!
How Can Personal Presence Assist in Business?
Although to read news articles, or spend time on social media today, it may seem that personal
presence does not matter. This is a fallacy when facing a new employer, seeking a promotion, or even
when starting a business of your own. You must look and act the part of success, and not what social
media deems fit now. The narratives on social media are meant to engage and the posts are meant to
generate shares and clicks. This is not the advice of any sort or the norm for personal presence.
Although dress codes are slightly more relaxed now, depending upon the company, it is best to ‘dress
up’ until you establish yourself and your presence rather than ‘dress down.’ In addition, studying a
company, or studying the logistics of lending if you are seeking a business loan, will expand your
knowledge and have the employer or bank officer more engaged with you right from the start. Personal
presence is also seen in dating and social situations.
Gravitas is a State of Being
Gravitas is a word that is used to explain dignity and people can state, ‘I met someone with Gravitas.’ It
is a synonym for engagement and seriousness, which does not mean solemn or downcast by any means,
although it comes from the Latin root word of ‘grave.’ People with gravitas are just truly engaged now
in situations in which they find themselves. They are aware of cues given off by others and tap into the
energy levels of those around them. Some can command a room in minutes, while others must work on
developing personal presence as it does not come naturally. The people with natural personal presence
simply have an instinctive connection and an energy that draws others to them. These are the
individuals that listen and learn immediately in any environment, but they are few and far between.
Most of us need assistance in working on our energy and connections with others.
How to Lead a Happier and More Successful Life?
Working on oneself is a continuous process. The presence we exude is a lifetime endeavor. The times
change, we change, the world changes, and what worked today might not work tomorrow in becoming
a standout with our presence. This does include how we dress, our hair even, or our makeup. No
matter what the scenario, looking like a throwback from the 80s or 90s will give off the wrong
impression to those we meet. On this site, with our blog, we will seek to establish ways to address any
problems that interfere with the development of social presence. Unconscious behaviors might exist, as
will unconscious mannerisms. This can all hurt the presence that exudes from each of us. It may be
harder for introverts to establish a social presence and that also will be addressed in other postings
here. Awareness is the first step and that is why this blog exists, to pinpoint how each person reading
can heighten their presence.
How Long Does It Take to Establish a Definitive Presence?
Personal presence or Gravitas, once learned, will continue to contribute to both business and personal
success throughout someone’s life. In other words, once you learn how to develop a personal presence,
it is not something that will abandon you in the future. It can be a learned behavior that stays with you
throughout life as the more you practice developing your presence, the more natural it becomes.
Everything about you can be developed into an astonishing personal presence, from the way you walk,
the way you talk, the way you make eye contact, and even the way you eat and drink in social situations
and business meetings. There is an old saying that ‘positive energy begets positive energy, and negative
energy begets negative energy’ and this is entirely true. Gravitas or presence is constant development.
There is no way to say that one can stop at any point as there is no endpoint. Gravitas is a point of view
and an objective look at situations and ourselves that is continuous.
Each Business or Social Situation Brings More Knowledge
It is important to take advantage of all opportunities to develop a better presence. This does take a bit
of courage as all of us avoid certain situations or people with whom we are not comfortable. Engaging
in the most uncomfortable situations, however, brings the most knowledge, as we continually can refine
and redefine ourselves in this manner. Taking a shot at a promotion you do not feel you will get,
attending a party with people you do not know, or applying for a job that you may not be qualified for
will bring discomfort. But this discomfort will lead to knowledge and development. Avoidance of
anything uncomfortable will cease growth in developing a presence no matter how insignificant the
situation might seem. Even if the actual event is a failure, you will ascertain that you do possess courage
and will be satisfied with yourself for participating and/or trying something new. Every person alive,
even those with presence who are extroverts, for the most part, do feel anxiety when faced with a new
situation but plow forward just the same. And this is a lesson everyone needs to learn. Avoidance is a
negative emotion while exposure to the unknown is a positive one.
How to Be Your Own Best Friend and Coach?
Start by positive reinforcements. We understand you have heard of this before and it might sound silly,
but it is proven to work. Look yourself in the mirror each day and out loud say inspirational and positive
acclamations to yourself. Tell yourself, ‘I am smart, successful, and people will want to be around me’,
or if attending a stressful business meeting, you can try saying, ‘I will impress them with my knowledge
and personality immediately.’ This works better than most people realize and has been used by many
successful people throughout their lives. If you feel inside that you are what you believe you are, it
shows when presenting yourself to others. Avoid all negative thoughts such as ‘I will be such a failure’
or ‘no one ever likes me.’ Negativity as stated above simply brings more negativity and that negativity
should never come from you, yourself. Ever!
What to Do About Failures?
Everyone fails at many things throughout their lives. The important part is to move onward and forward
and not dwell on these. You can call this ‘failing forward’ as it is not a failure per se but a learning
experience. A failure many times teaches individuals more than success does as it makes us change our
behaviors and attitudes about things. Our subconscious absorbs the events in slow motion sometimes
and if we go over the incidents where we fail, objectively without feeling discouraged, we do find
ourselves emerging with a better knowledge base on how others are perceiving us. The more we reach
out to unusual situations and the more we fail, the more we can learn if we can find it in ourselves to be
courageous and not self-disparaging. Self-disparagement is the most common type of negative emotion
and for those who do not understand self-disparagement is simply means ‘feeling unworthy’ when a
failure occurs. All self-disparagement must be eliminated. Even the most notable celebrities have tried
and failed and do fall victim to self-disparagement. Phobias and fear of failure can result from these
unless we view failures as learning experiences. In other words, see each failure in a positive light,
analyze it, and then incorporate what you have learned into the new business or social activity that is
unfamiliar to you.
How Do You Confront People that Hold You Back?
You might not even recognize the signs of individuals that are holding you back in your personal
development. These can be parents, friends, or even co-workers. They may seem like they mean well,
by encouraging you not to try new things or reach out to achieve your full potential. When you are
afraid of a situation, they might encourage you not to even try and succeed in it, especially with a job or
if you plan to start a business. They are doing damage. They are enablers of your stagnation and you
become more fearful not less. There also might be people in your life that engage in what is called toxic
positivity. This is not something known to others usually especially younger individuals, but when you
fail, they might tell you to look on the bright side, instead of determining why you failed and dissecting
the parts of the failure that would help you develop insights. While it is a good thing to be positive, toxic
positivity is generally meaningless as trite phrases are used, without any real substance. Phrases such as
‘you are you’ and ‘don’t be dramatic’ are hurtful, not helpful, and can simply engage your sense of
failure does not help you move past it and learn from failures.
Individual Change Brings Presence
An open mind must be kept though, or your life will just grind on by while others pass you by in the
pursuit of happiness and success in business and their personal lives. Those you see that accomplish
things have learned the true meaning of personal presence and Gravitas and are into exploring other
concepts and ways of living and interactions with others. Try to imagine yourself twenty years from
now. Are you on the path to success or is each day just a repetition of the one before? Are you stuck in
old habits with individuals that do not push you to increase your awareness of yourself and move
forward? The one thing all successful individuals in business, no matter what their business, and in their
personal lives have in common is presence. Look at the rock stars on television. Look at the social
media tycoons. Look at the individuals you meet in your own life, the doctors and lawyers with money
and successful family life. They all have one thing in common. PRESENCE! Gravitas and its theories can
show you the way to develop your special presence and learn consistently throughout life. Do not listen
or believe everything others tell you. Make your own decisions about what you want out of life and
follow your dreams. Change is scary, but it is also fruitful. Developing a presence is also difficult but
worth the effort.
Follow This Blog and Each Article Here
Keep reading our thoughts as we put a lot of time into the theory of developing presence. Each article
will touch on a different subject, from business meetings and dinners to dating scenarios. Real-life
instances will be used to show our readers how one person succeeded while another failed. This is
priceless, and it is the mission of Gravitas, our website, and this blog. In the meantime, try baby steps
yourself with the positive affirmations mentioned above. We guarantee that if you do these
affirmations daily, you will see an eventual change in your confidence and your ability to try new things
fearlessly. Attack the world, just do not linger in it. We are behind your efforts 100 percent!